has humanity gone?

it's hard to go on like this.feeling guilty doing things we loved, but at the same time, hurt others.huhu~life sure is so complicated.but well, should've been that way..at this kind of mood, i just wanna go back home~to my mum n dad..to my family..but i'll feel guilty coz i hadnt finished up my assignment!not even started yet!huhu..my mini instrumentation project, i've got my part.multiple application of research problem in flow cytometry.didn't even have any clues.i was hoping that i'll got application to clinical but they make a coin toss~shikatanai..i'm not that lucky.well, i actually leave my blog quite some time.i wanna write about last week programe, under caring society of my college.as the name suggest, we were visiting oldfolk homes and kompleks anak2 yatim, located at malacca.the duration of the programe is just a whole day.quite tiring, but so meaningful.i suddenly realize some qualities in me, that i actually love all those charity programe (i never knew that before).tears started to flow when we talked to the old man n woman..most of them were abandoned by their own family n child.where children are not able to take care of them anymore or outspokenly, dont wanna care bout them anymore!huhu..sense of love and caring to the old people are ceasing..severely decreasing..i can feel the way they felt, but they are the one who handles the burden within inside their chest..it's so painful~being neglected n forgotten by own flesh..who their raised up painfully..without any condition..how could they have such heart?obeying is one thing.but what's matter here is not that.as a human being, they've lost natural humanity inside themselves..huhu..i pray for those old people there~they live life well..waiting for their times to come..counting the days..i noe from their faces~they bear a heavy burden of sadness~~~

Never Alone~

I waited for you today
But you didn't show
No no no
I needed You today
So where did You go?
You told me to call
Said You'd be there
And though I haven't seen You
Are You still there?
I cried out with no reply
And I can't feel You by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I"m never alone
And though I cannot see You
And I can't explain why
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life
We cannot separate' Cause You're part of me
And though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen

i'm coming back!

it has been quite a long time i didn't write anything on this board.mainly because i have lots of things to do and whenever i came across my site, i began to have no idea on what am i suppose to write.i think..i have lost my ability to write properly!huhu~..well..i dunno what to write so i guess i should start with writing about my daily basis..(is this jerking?huhu).to be realistic, what is going on my life rite now is that i am struggling to rearrange my timetable.today is wednesday (almost dawn).gotta go to B6 tonite having a discussion with dr zul.so tonite will be the basic nite.i wont be able to study any other subject other than basic.yeah..kind of preparation for the next week test.coming back from that, maybe around 10pm, there's no enough time for me to prepare for my report.assuming my mood to study will turned to another mode~maybe yming time or gaming time or dvding time.but most probably i'll just read through tomorrow's lecture notes.well then for tomorrow..i maybe go to shah alam..why can't i just get rid of those friend's invitation to go out an outing?what a weak kind of me..huhu.after basic class, i probably will go there with an intention of well..u should noe..shopping of course.calculating times, i guess i should arrive at college before maghrib.then i noe how it feels.exhausted.so..i may not be able to do anything again at nite.so..a waste of time again.friday i have another appoinment with my friend at midvalley..hehe..i decide this..so blame it on me =p.next week will be a tough week.submission date of my basic genetics report is on 17th february.maybe basic test will be on this day too.then microbial genetics test will be on thursday, 19th february.there are lots of things to remember and some of the subtopics..i really have no idea of what is that all about because i am such a lazy and reluctant girl to revise again after i didnt understand that.huhu..a real me is ceasing..somebody tasukete!!help me please..huhu..why am i starting to be lazy and take things so easy?n next week i will also have a project in malacca and it will take me a day there.so as the part of the society, i have to do some task which require my times..AGAIN!but after all,i learned something from all these..like dr zul said..all nobel prize winner (i'm not saying i have an ambition to be a nobel prize winner..lols) are getting their results of new findings when they stumble upon something..it occurs not as they planned.they do not expect it to be that way..so in my case, i think i have to just go on like that..using the very second of the times accomplishing every work i should've done..giving priority to things i should do first.and do not sigh!because who noes in doing all that, i will coincidently find something new to my life..which bring me to more than happiness~..